Expectations are the Main Source of Frustration

ExpectationsI know this isn’t the self-help-section, but bear with me a moment. Please think about all those moments in your life in which you felt frustration. In how many cases was this connected to unrealistic expectations?

Did you ever expect someone to treat you the way you would treat them and they didn’t? Did you ever expect someone to love you back and, well, yes, they didn’t? All those daydreams that you were sure would come true and – you guessed it – they didn’t.

On the other hand, did you ever meet someone and automatically expected them to dislike you and that is just what happened? Do you keep getting hurt by the same person over and over again?

If any of this applies to you, do not scold yourself, all of these are examples of your humanity. But it also calls for a shift in your mindsets. This might sound easier said than done and yes, in reality, these shifts are the hardest. Granted, it took me years, far longer than the course of my college training.

I feel like the solution to this problem is two-fold: On the one hand, replace your expectations with hope and hard work. On the other hand, don’t fall prey to self-fulfilling prophecies!

And why am I telling you this? Because it all applies to auditions, too!

Replace Expectations with Hope

Here’s my premise: Hope is connected to value.

If you simply expect something to happen, you will not value it, when it finally does. To stay with my example of romance, you will not value a relationship if you simply expect it to happen. And you will not value your partner if you just expect them to be there. You will also not put your heart and soul into your relationship. Get it?

The same rule applies to auditions. If you expect a school to take you onboard, you will not value the programme once you get in. And you will not work your a** off – as you should-  during preparations. If they don’t take you in, it might leave you in shock and with no alternatives.

If you hope for a spot though, not being taken might motivate you to work even harder for your next audition. Yes, it will hurt, but part of you has also been preparing for dealing with rejection. And that process alone is a reward in itself.

Self-Fulfilling Prophecies

If you expect yourself to fail, you will! Simple as that!

Don’t stand in your own way with these negative thoughts! They will not only affect your own performance at the audition but also how the casting directors see you.

To quote my dear friend – The Audition Rep Matchmaker – , “Maybe the Casting Director isn’t looking at you, because on some level you don’t want to be looked at.”

Maybe it is an act of mirror neurons, maybe – on an unconscious level – the casting director will turn away because he feels that is what you need.

But hooooooold on for a minute! You DO want to get in that programme! You DO want to succeed! And yes, in order for that to happen, you DO want the casting directors to look at you!

So, instead of expecting things to go wrong, accept the fact that you cannot control everything. Instead, prepare for all the things that are in your control and let the universe take care of the rest. 😉

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